FF: Tantalising Touch (Part 19)

Part 19

"I love you, Khushi." Those words released Khushi from her trance as he made to kiss her again. She pulled his face away from hers and looked deep in his eyes, seeing nothing but honesty and love, unguarded feeling, reflecting back at her.

---

Khushi paused for a while, subconsciously stroking his face. It took her a while to gather her thoughts, and Arnav's strong gaze on her didn't help her thought process.

 "Arnavji, what are we doing?" She asked, her resolve slipping with every moment she stared into his eyes. Khushi felt herself getting lost in them and she knew she had to get answers from him now or risk losing the little control she had over herself.

"What are we doing?" Came his reply, a husky whisper against her lips.

"T-this isn't supposed to happen."

"Why not?" He asked as he moved closer. She released his face and moved her own away from him. Not meeting his eyes, she spoke again.

"Because..." He raised an eyebrow.

"Because?"

"We both seem to do nothing but hurt each other." She whispered, almost inaudibly. It hurt her to say this to him, but she knew she had no choice. Arnav pulled back slightly to look at her properly. "The way we met, our marriage... don't you think everything is working against us?" Arnav paused for a while, thinking about what she said.

"We've had our problems, Khushi, but isn't our relationship strong enough to get through them?"

"Arnavji, please. Don't do this." Khushi swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat, her voice shaking. Arnav got up from the bed, frustration building up inside him.

"Do what? Tell you that I believe in you; that I believe in us?" Khushi flinched at his raised voice and rose her own to match his.

"Us? What us, Arnavji? You gave up on us the second you wrote me that letter!" Arnav grabbed her forearms and held her flush against him.

"I never gave up on us, don't you understand?!" He loosened his grip on her and turned around as he continued. "I did this for your own good, Khushi."

"My own good?" She spoke softly.

"I know I'm no good for you Khushi. So I gave that letter to Arjun because I wanted to give you a shot at happiness. I knew that he would keep you happy; a task I've failed miserably in attempting. I didn't want thoughts of me, or what could have happened between us, to prevent you from living the rest of your life happily with Arjun." Arnav turned to face her, exposing his vulnerability to her, looking far away into the distance. "But I'm selfish, Khushi. I thought I had lost you forever, but when I saw you sat at my bedside I thought that perhaps all was not lost. I dared to hope again, because of you. I hoped against hope that Di was wrong, that you didn't marry him." Khushi stared at Arnav, dumbstruck at his outburst. Her heart swelled as she acknowledged that Arnav had for once worn his heart on his sleeve and told her exactly what he was feeling. She had never felt so close to him before.

"Arnavji, I..." She was interrupted by Arnav, who looked in her direction once before hastily looking away again.

"Khushi, I can't keep this up anymore."

"Keep what up?"

"All of this." Arnav gestured around him. "Avoiding going within a mile's radius of you whenever you come to see Payal, trying to convince myself that I never loved you, trying to forget the feeling of you in my arms & trying not to long for you to come back where you belong." Arnav sighed, softly touching his forehead to hers. "What have you done to me, Khushi? Why does everything you do have such a big effect on me? Ever since you left I've been asking myself this question, and despite how much I have fought with my heart I always arrived at the same conclusion; I'm madly in love with you, Khushi Kumari Gupta. I can't live without you."

Without warning, Khushi threw her arms around Arnav, allowing herself to fully express the relief she felt at him being safe. Arnav hugged her back tightly, as if she would disappear if he let her go for a second. Tears threatened to fall from both their eyes, but for the first time in a long time they would be tears of joy. They remained like that for a while, lost in each other's arms.

"When I heard about the accident, everything went out of the window. I didn't care about what happened between us in the past, I didn't care about the guests anticipating a wedding. All I kept pleading with Devi Maiyya for was your health. I was so lost..." Arnav pulled her closer, burying his face in her hair.

"Shh, Khushi. I know." He kissed her forehead softly.

"I love you too, Arnavji. It's always been you." Arnav tilted Khushi's face towards him and leaned towards her. This time she met him halfway, overwhelmed with feeling and her love for him. Their lips met, sending sparks flying through their bodies and radiating the atmosphere around them. Arnav's hands roamed around Khushi's back, Khushi's mouth opened to allow their tongues to mesh together, with minimal distance between the two of them. Khushi pulled away first with a smile. Before she could revel in the feeling of having finally unlocked the warmth hidden in ASR's cold heart, she knew that she had something very important to discuss with him. She took a deep breath whilst trying to still her hands, having just realised they were shaking.

"Arnavji..." Arnav detected Khushi's worry at once.

"What's wrong Khushi? Is this not what you want? Talk to me, Khushi." Khushi shook her head quickly.

"No, no it's not that." Holding Arnav's hand in hers, she sat him down on her bed.

"Khushi, you're worrying me now." Khushi counted to 10 silently, urging her voice not to shake when she spoke. Her words came out in a rush.

"What if I told you that I thought Arjun, the man who you were so sure would keep me happy, was responsible for your accident?" Khushi whispered, feeling that if she said it quietly enough the thought would disappear and she would realise how ridiculous it seemed. But it didn't seem ridiculous to her; in fact, the more she thought about it the more she was convincing herself that her worry was justified. She turned Arnav so he was facing her directly, but it seemed as if his expression was frozen in place. She cupped his face with her hands. "Think, Arnavji. What do you remember from the accident?" Arnav finally looked into Khushi's eyes, confusion evident on his face.

"N-nothing. I don't... I don't remember anything. I've tried so hard to remember, Khushi, but that portion of my memory has just gone blank. I remember what had happened directly before, but I have no memory remaining until I woke up in the hospital. Khushi, why do I remember nothing but bright headlights? Why can I not recall anything but wanting to see your face one last time before I...?" Arnav's words were left unsaid as Khushi placed her hand over his mouth and shook her head. She couldn't bear to hear Arnav talking about such things.

"Arnavji, you have no idea about who caused the collision?"

"No." He spoke solemnly.

"It's okay. We'll work it out, together." She smiled up at him as he twined his fingers with hers.

"Now, forget all of that. It's time for to talk. About us." He looked at their hands before looking back at her. "What are we going to tell everyone?"

"Arnavji, I-I don't want to tell anyone anything just yet. We both know that they're just going to demand that the two of us get married again. You know the saying - once bitten, twice shy-"

"And third time lucky?" Arnav interjected, making Khushi laugh.

"Something like that."

"So what do you propose we do?" Arnav asked, earning a shrug from Khushi.

"I don't know. Maybe we could spend some time getting to know each other, and then decide to get remarried when the time is right?"

"You mean dating?!" Arnav spoke in mock shock. Khushi threw her pillow at him.

"Not dating. We're beyond that, Arnavji. This is just us buying some time and learning new things about one another. Every marriage I've gone through so far has been so rushed." Arnav's face dropped and he immediately looked remorseful.

"I'm so sorry, Khushi. I was indirectly the reason for you meeting Shyam, I was the one who forced you to marry me & I was the one who pushed you to marry Arjun. I'm so sorry." Khushi stopped him.

"That's in the past, Arnavji. We need to look forward. But with us, now, I want us to do this properly. I don't want to rush into anything." Arnav nodded and rose up from the bed. He walked towards the door & turned back to face her once again.

"Our first date's tomorrow. I'll pick you up at 8." He winked and ducked before she threw another pillow at him, laughing.

That night, for the first time in a long time Khushi went to bed with a smile on her face, a blush tinting her face at the thought of her future with Arnav.

 "I have a meeting with Aakash Raizada." The man addressed the receptionist before him.

"May I ask who you are?"

"Mr Sharma; accountant of AR Group."